Medication and Mental Health: How It Changed My Life

An honest, first-hand account of starting, adjusting, and living with medication for depression and bipolar disorder—and how it transformed my journey.

I’ve been taking meds (sounds a bit lighter than “medication”) for over 20 years. I take two types—one for depression, one for bipolar.

At first, what I found unsettling was that there wasn’t a definitive test to determine what was going on. No blood test. No brain scan. Just me describing what was happening inside my head to a psychiatrist, who then made a diagnosis. It felt unscientific—too prone to error.

But over time, I’ve come to understand that each mental illness has its own distinct features. Unique patterns of thought, behaviour and language. If you’ve experienced one, you’ll likely recognise their descriptions.

Medication has also come a long way. What once felt like being hit over the head with a sledgehammer is now more like a well-aimed tap. One therapist I respected called them “vitamins for the brain”, which helped get me over the line.

The snag? What works for one person might not work for another. It felt like an experiment at first—but I was lucky. Although it took a few months to settle in, the meds worked for me on the first try.

I started with antidepressants. These were aimed at lifting the constant lethargy, that mind-numbing grey fog. I began with a low dose and slowly built up over six weeks. There were side effects: nausea, faintness (almost collapsing during a pitch to a top business school), constant yawning—which wasn’t great while coaching others. But within a couple of months, I had a brain that actually worked effectively. For the first time in my life. That felt amazing.

A year later, when the bipolar disorder was diagnosed, I began medication specifically for bipolar. This felt more serious. The doses are higher, and for the medication I was taking there was the potential for physical side effects such as liver damage. These meds help me regulate my moods and handle the minor highs and lows better. But my extended highs—especially the ones linked to my business ideas—were more difficult. The high would build over months and only when the stress became too much, I would crash. Hard. And while the meds can’t prevent every crash, I suspect they soften the crash slightly.

Meds can also lose effectiveness over time. During lockdown, I had three crashes in relatively quick succession. I reached out—first to my GP, then the local NHS psychiatrist who adjusted my medication for both bipolar disorder and depression. I started with the bipolar medication and before long, the depression, enhanced by the medication, took hold. It was brutal. Once the antidepressant was added, my mood lifted to a comfortable mid-point. It felt like a miracle.

Still, the bottom line is simple: medication has given me a life worth living. And my goodness, that feels superb.